You spend day after day looking over your shoulder hoping no one finds out who you really are and suddenly one day, it was all over.
Everyone thinks you have it all together. You arrive to work 30 minutes early, first in the conference room for team meetings, notes in-hand and your ideas are always big hitters with the boss. If only they knew who you really were and how you spend day after day winging it, hoping to get it right.
In your mind, you’re not that good and have no idea how much longer you can keep up this charade. There, you said it! It’s all in your mind. It’s where fear resides and makes you second guess your every move. It’s impostor’s syndrome and people around the world live with it or perhaps, in fear of it every day. Individuals who suffer from this find it challenging to believe that they could ever accomplish the things they have without mere luck. They fear themselves inadequate to be hard workers, confident in their social circles or successful at anything they set out to do.
The Professional Perspective
While impostor syndrome is not medically recognized as a condition or a disease, it is studied by psychologists in great depth. If categorized, it would likely appear among other similar psychological disorders, but there is very little information available from research on this fear of inadequacy. The information may be scarce but knowledgeable experts believe that the fear that lives in the mind of so many people, can be defeated. It is important that they understand what they are dealing with and more importantly, to take the necessary steps to overcome their fears. There are common signs and symptoms associated with impostor’s syndrome and not everyone knows how to recognize them. If you are living in constant fear and concerned that you are not as good as others think you are, we can chat.
You may not be aware of what those feelings of fear stem from, but you wish to overcome them. Below are four ways to defeat impostor syndrome and regain control of your life, of your success.
Reframe Your Thought Process
Change the way you think about your success by changing the way you speak of it. Become more positive in your thought process and vocalize the positive attributes of your life. The more you hear yourself say them, the more convinced you’ll be that they are true. Remind yourself that you make good decisions or that you can absolutely do the next big thing. Practice this behavior whenever self-doubt invades your private headspace.
Revisit Previous Successes
Occasionally, you should think back to some of the previous moments of success you’ve experienced in life. Small and big successes should be celebrated, but most importantly for some, they should be remembered. Think of how you accomplished what you did and you’ll eventually realize that your success was the result of your diligence and determination. Try to think of other people who have experienced similar successes as your own and you’ll quickly realize that it is possible to achieve that level of success, even for you.
Behavioral counseling is a step closer to overcoming the doubt that lives inside your head. Professional coaching can help you to engage in cognitive counseling that is therapeutic for your behavior. This type of therapy is used to manipulate the brain and change the way it thinks and behaves. The therapy shouldn’t be viewed as a quick fix, and in fact, the time it takes for the reconditioning of the brain to become effective varies from person to person. The counseling should be conducted by a therapist or psychologist that is trained in behavioral therapy.
Know the Difference Between Fraud and Authenticity
Imposter syndrome causes people to believe that they are not capable of doing things that bring them applause and success. Experts recommend that you disassociate negative thoughts and feelings from anything you do at work, school or in your social circle. Focus on the things that you do and break them down to understand how you did them. This instills in your mind and ultimately prove that you are capable because you made everything happen just as it should. Doing so brings you out of the imposter shell and helps to ignite positive feelings about the outcome or end-result.
If you are living in the shadows of your own success and constantly feel worried that your best is not enough, this is where I can help. It’s time to evict the doubt that resides within, and walk freely in your own success.